Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Can't fake the Funk

What is up, my hommies? Thanks goes to the many of you faithful readers who have trodded back here day after day, and now week after week, only to be denied a new post. Well, no more! In today's installment of 'How the Black, White, Left, & Right Turns' we take a look at the issue of Koran defacement within the US Justice Department, namely during interrogations of would-be terrorists (do not note any sarcasm). The initial story of a Koran being flushed down the toilet by by stuffy dudes in shirts and ties pretending to be the next Kujo was subsequently retracted by Newsweek with the administration having the gefall to jump down on Newsweek. Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld said:

"People need to be very careful about what they say just as people need to be careful about what they do"
*Don comes to the microphone* 'Excuse me, Mr. Secretary, but have you found the weapons of mass destruction?' *Inaudible response from sweat bead-laden countenance of said Secretary* Let's see here flushing the Koran down the toilet OR no weapons of mass destruction. Toilet or WMD? The Can or nuclear weapons? This administration astonishes me in how it dispels its mistakes by living in a constant state of denial while harping on less pertinent mistakes made by others with furiousness not unlike that of an emasciated dog who's bloodshot eyes spot a week old KFC thigh bone. Yummy! And now we're hearing reports of the Koran being stood on, kicked, and 'inadvertently' peed on. Here's the U.S. Southern Command response from Brig. General Jay W. Hood, noting what Rumsfeld said regarding Newsweek as you read:
Mishandling a Koran at Guantanamo Bay is a rare occurrence [...] Mishandling of a Koran here is never condoned. When one considers the many thousands of times detainees have been moved and cells have been searched since detention operations first began here in January 2002, I think one can only conclude that respect for detainee religious beliefs was embedded in the culture of [the task force] from the start.
That says it all, dear reader, says it all. I don't think I need to write another word...well perhaps just a few more - STOP FAKING THE FUNK.


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